GUILT

I had a weekend away. It came with a price... GUILT.

What is that? I don't really remember feeling guilty when I was single. Of course, I don't remember feeling much of anything when I was single, except selfish.
I had my girls, then wham, I am daunted with this new emotion.
There are roughly 49 weekends a year that I spend with my family, I have taken 2 weekends to myself this year....I know it doesn't add up, but somewhere in there, I have gotten a hair color, pedicure, massage or something on the weekend, so I am allowing for 1 more weekend that I may have possibly been absent a few hours, here and there, ok? SEE, guilt!
Anyhow, what is that all about? I felt sad when I woke up at 7:30 AM on Saturday, a whopping 30 minutes later than usual, because I missed my girls (I had only been away for 19 hours). It is crazy, when I am with them all the time, I dream of laying on the beach and sleeping in...then, I am away from them, lying on the beach and kind of sleeping in, so, I feel GUILTY about it.
I got over it and was on the beach all day, parked far away from any children and went dancing that night (a favorite pastime).
Oh, the price. Got sick Sunday with a respiratory something or another. I am sure it was from smoke inhalation that I am allergic to and the fact that I colored my hair a few days before with some insanely strong ammonia...I am not even sure there was very much color in that box of ammonia, but my hair is incredibly "sanitized", I will say that.
I am still under the weather, and I feel bad about that also. The girls didn't have me all weekend, now they have to fend for themselves as I lay on the couch hacking up a lung.
Sick, tired and guilty....geez, I need therapy! Or a nice massage and a new handbag to feel normal again....haha-